Om weekender, vasketøj og nedbrydende tanker

jul 20, 2014 by

Weekenden er det, jeg ser allermest frem til hver uge. Når jeg hører ordet “weekend”, tænker jeg altid, at det er ensbetydende med ingen arbejde, ingen ure der ringer og bare afslapning og opladning til en ny uge. Sådan er det måskie hos de fleste familier, men ikke hos os.
På trods af min manglende energi, manglende overskud og dårlige evne til at planlægge ting i god tid, ender det altid med, at vores weekender bliver fyldt med en masse aktiviteter. Don’t take me wrong, vi elsker at lave ting og sager i weekenden, især de impulsive ting som grillaftener hos familien, en tur på stranden, oprydning i haven/kælderen etc. Problemet opstår dog når vi kommer til søndag. Hele familien, far, mor og børn, er fuldstændig smadrede og vi har ikke overskud til andet, end at sidder foran fjerneren og glo serie-søndag!
Hvorfor sker det?
Jo altså, selvom man har en kronisk træthed, og nærmest altid drømmer om sin seng, hovedpude og dyne, så kan ens hjerne godt have lyst til at blive underholdt. Jeg er virkelig social, og ELSKER at være sammen med andre mennesker – jeg bruger bare mange ressourcer på det, men det giver mig også meget “energi”. Som regel bliver jeg enormt inspireret, af at være sammen med andre. Når jeg ser deres meget klinisk rene, ordentlige og fuldstændig ryddede hjem, har jeg, selv kl. 02.00 om natten, lyst til at gå hjem og ordne mine køkkenskabe, sortere i mit klædeskab, støvsuge og tørre støv af. Det skal siges, at jeg sjældent gør det, men lysten er der bestemt. Det der afholder mig fra at komme i gang, er mine egne destruktive tanker. Jeg er tilbøjelig til at fortælle mig selv, at det er meget hårdt at ordne de køkkenskabe, vasketøjet er nærmest umuligt at få sat over, for slet ikke at tale om klædeskabet – tøjet vil jo overfalde mig, hvis jeg begynder at ordne på det.
Ved ikke om andre har samme nedbrydende tankegang, tanken om, at alt er meget værre, end det egentlig er, og at det er bedre at lade være. Jeg hader virkelig mig selv for ikke at være fuldstændig ligeglad, og bare komme i gang, få lettet måsen. For jeg kan jo godt sidde ude og hygge mig til kl. 02.00 om natten sammen med venner og familie (jo jo, jeg ér smadret flere dage efter), men hvorfor så ikke også tage ét skab af gangen?

Vi skulle på ferie i juni måned, og som I nok kan regne ud, lever jeg ikke med en tom vasketøjskurv. Nej, den er altid, pretty much, fyldt til randen. Jeg vasker, når det begynder at tynde i skabene.
Nå, men altså, vi skulle på ferie, og af en eller anden mystisk årsag, blev jeg pludselig fuldstændig besat af vasketøjet og det faktum, at jeg IKKE ville komme hjem til vasketøj. På én uge vaskede jeg godt og vel 20 maskiner, min datter kunne dårlig nok nå at komme hjem fra børnehaven, før jeg “flåede” tøjet af hende for at vaske det!! Det er jo heller ikke normalt, men bare rolig. Jeg er næsten røget helt tilbage til min “gamle” vasketøjs-livsstil, som jeg vist har omtalt før. Nu orker jeg ikke gå i vaskekælderen for at sætte en vask over, jeg orker ikke at hænge det op, når jeg endelig har vasket, og jeg har slet ikke overskud til at folde sammen og lægge tøjet på plads! Det værste er, at jeg godt selv kan ser, hvor latterligt dumt det lyder. I skrivende stund er der tøj i maskinen, som skal hænges til tørre – jeg oooorker ikke gå ned og gøre det, jeg er træt… Tøjet har ligger der i 2 dage!

Nu er vores dejlige weekend slut, og vi kan ikke vente til det bliver fredag igen. Næste weekend er slet ikke planlagt, men jeg er sikker på, at vores impulsivitet får fyldt den op med flere dejlige venner, skøn familie og måske endda også serie-søndag foran fjerneren – ja ja, vejret er måske alt for godt til TV, men vi nyder vejret de andre dage. Vi elsker TV, TV kurerer næsten alt. Det får i hvert fald tankerne væk fra alt det negative i en kort stund.
Ha’ en fortsat skøn søndag aften 🙂

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